Hi,
So, I was planning to catch up with the rest of the story about Shelby's arrival and recovering from the surgery.
But writing as much as I did hurt.
So here I am, two months later, and haven't done it yet.
Maybe today. but not yet.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Monday, July 4, 2011
How Shelby Got Here
Warning: If you are not into birth stories, don't read any further. And if you are pregnant, you might want to hold off too. For while my story has a happy ending, there's alot of speed bumps. And the car got damaged along the way.
Don't say I didn't warn you.
So on the morning of my 38 week check up, I was seriously psyched to hear that I was making progress and was in early labor. I had lost my plug. Both of the boys were born at 38 weeks, 2 days. But, instead, Shelby had flipped so she was butt down again, after spending most of the pregnancy transverse, and then flipping head down at 37 weeks.
The doctor brought up c-section. "This is going to be a big baby." "Head down, or heads-up." etc, etc. I so did not want to have surgery! The bottom line was, she was coming out one way or another, and I was convinced that I could deliver her. After all, if my co-worker, who was much smaller than me, could deliver an almost 11 lb baby, surely she'd be able to be delivered non-surgically (after 3 babies, hubby still winces when I use the v word).
39 weeks. still no progress. We walked and walked and walked some more. Lots of contractions, but they would go away on their own.
40 weeks. I had a no bs conversation with one of the two doctors in my practice that I trusted. I even said to him, "Don't bullshit me. Can I deliver this baby" He said, no, probably not. So I listened as I got caught up in the gallop to the o.r. All of a sudden, it was, we're doing this tonight or tomorrow. Standing in the bookstore, I got the call telling me it was tomorrow, be at the hospital at 5 am., get pre-op bloodwork drawn immediately.
We made arrangements for the boys to stay with my niece, and got to the hospital on time...checked in. The whole time, we are cracking jokes about not knowing what we are supposed to do because we didn't pay attention during the tour. The first nurse we encountered was great! comforting, no-nonsense, efficient. As she got me ready for the surgery, she was answering questions, cracking jokes, talking about her children...I was still nervous, but she was helping. My doc (the other of the 2 that I liked) came in, met hubby, told me a couple of things, and then said, "Let's go."
I walked to the o.r. Hubby had to stay outside until I was completely prepped. They put a guy in front of me, to hold me in the position for the spinal. The last time I had this, I was holding my teddy bear, and I was having contractions. This time, I was being held by a stranger.
The anesthesiologist (I am going to call him Dr. A because that's shorter to type) started pricking my back. There was something he was doing, a very painful pressure against the right side of my back..it felt like he was pushing into my spine itself. I complained about that. He asked me where it hurt, and I told him. He pulled the needle out, called for more numbing cream, and tried again. Same pain. Same place. Lots more needle sticks.
The guy in front of me was still holding me in position, pushing against Shelby to get me in the right place. That's where I will say I was very nervous...what if the needle hit her??? Probably impossible, but it was freaky. That's what I was thinking about when all of a sudden, this MONSTROUS pain went roaring down my left leg, and my leg kicked straight out in front of me, kicking the guy that was holding me, and I cried out. I was admonished to stay still, to not move. My doctor came over and asked what was going on. I didn't hear his answer.
I asked Dr. A if we were almost done. He said no. I was doing all I could to distract myself from the pain, telling myself that I had to go through this to get to Shelby. He asked for more numbing cream, and he poked me again. The same pain, again. This must be what it feels like to be electrocuted. This time, I screamed. I couldn't help it. I was sobbing, it hurt so bad. Then, my whole lower body went numb...he finally had the spinal completed.
I have at times imagined that if I hadn't been in so much pain, if the rest of the procedure would have seemed the same. They brought hubby in, who lied to me and told me that he didn't hear me screaming.
Dr. A gave me another med to help me relax...the spinal numbs you from the nipples down, so you cannot feel yourself breathing. Of course, if you can say, "I'm not breathing" you ARE in fact breathing...but still, it was very freaky. I felt like I was encased in cement.
The surgical team did some stuff with taping me (I have the impression of a big X, but I am not sure about that) and then they put the drape up and started cutting. I have no idea how long it took. I have vague memories of them saying, "Here she is!" and of the doctor commenting that it was unusual for there to be a tube and ovary removed during an ectopic, but I didn't hear Shelby cry (hubby did), and I didn't know of the drama that was surrounding my daughter as I was on the table being closed up.
Apparently, before she took a breath, she took in a huge mouthful of fluid, so they had to suction her repeatedly, and the neonatalogist was very concerned about her. AFter they got her cleared enough to move her, they asked me to hold her to take her to recovery, but I was too out of it and didn't respond.
I don't remember a lot of the recovery time, as they waited for a bed for me upstairs. I remember getting bathed, which was really freakin' weird, as Shelby got her first bath (thankfully, hubby was watching her bath, not mine!).
As we started to get acquainted, I had no idea what I was in for. The next morning would find me in excruciating pain, but not from my incision. to be continued...
Don't say I didn't warn you.
So on the morning of my 38 week check up, I was seriously psyched to hear that I was making progress and was in early labor. I had lost my plug. Both of the boys were born at 38 weeks, 2 days. But, instead, Shelby had flipped so she was butt down again, after spending most of the pregnancy transverse, and then flipping head down at 37 weeks.
The doctor brought up c-section. "This is going to be a big baby." "Head down, or heads-up." etc, etc. I so did not want to have surgery! The bottom line was, she was coming out one way or another, and I was convinced that I could deliver her. After all, if my co-worker, who was much smaller than me, could deliver an almost 11 lb baby, surely she'd be able to be delivered non-surgically (after 3 babies, hubby still winces when I use the v word).
39 weeks. still no progress. We walked and walked and walked some more. Lots of contractions, but they would go away on their own.
40 weeks. I had a no bs conversation with one of the two doctors in my practice that I trusted. I even said to him, "Don't bullshit me. Can I deliver this baby" He said, no, probably not. So I listened as I got caught up in the gallop to the o.r. All of a sudden, it was, we're doing this tonight or tomorrow. Standing in the bookstore, I got the call telling me it was tomorrow, be at the hospital at 5 am., get pre-op bloodwork drawn immediately.
We made arrangements for the boys to stay with my niece, and got to the hospital on time...checked in. The whole time, we are cracking jokes about not knowing what we are supposed to do because we didn't pay attention during the tour. The first nurse we encountered was great! comforting, no-nonsense, efficient. As she got me ready for the surgery, she was answering questions, cracking jokes, talking about her children...I was still nervous, but she was helping. My doc (the other of the 2 that I liked) came in, met hubby, told me a couple of things, and then said, "Let's go."
I walked to the o.r. Hubby had to stay outside until I was completely prepped. They put a guy in front of me, to hold me in the position for the spinal. The last time I had this, I was holding my teddy bear, and I was having contractions. This time, I was being held by a stranger.
The anesthesiologist (I am going to call him Dr. A because that's shorter to type) started pricking my back. There was something he was doing, a very painful pressure against the right side of my back..it felt like he was pushing into my spine itself. I complained about that. He asked me where it hurt, and I told him. He pulled the needle out, called for more numbing cream, and tried again. Same pain. Same place. Lots more needle sticks.
The guy in front of me was still holding me in position, pushing against Shelby to get me in the right place. That's where I will say I was very nervous...what if the needle hit her??? Probably impossible, but it was freaky. That's what I was thinking about when all of a sudden, this MONSTROUS pain went roaring down my left leg, and my leg kicked straight out in front of me, kicking the guy that was holding me, and I cried out. I was admonished to stay still, to not move. My doctor came over and asked what was going on. I didn't hear his answer.
I asked Dr. A if we were almost done. He said no. I was doing all I could to distract myself from the pain, telling myself that I had to go through this to get to Shelby. He asked for more numbing cream, and he poked me again. The same pain, again. This must be what it feels like to be electrocuted. This time, I screamed. I couldn't help it. I was sobbing, it hurt so bad. Then, my whole lower body went numb...he finally had the spinal completed.
I have at times imagined that if I hadn't been in so much pain, if the rest of the procedure would have seemed the same. They brought hubby in, who lied to me and told me that he didn't hear me screaming.
Dr. A gave me another med to help me relax...the spinal numbs you from the nipples down, so you cannot feel yourself breathing. Of course, if you can say, "I'm not breathing" you ARE in fact breathing...but still, it was very freaky. I felt like I was encased in cement.
The surgical team did some stuff with taping me (I have the impression of a big X, but I am not sure about that) and then they put the drape up and started cutting. I have no idea how long it took. I have vague memories of them saying, "Here she is!" and of the doctor commenting that it was unusual for there to be a tube and ovary removed during an ectopic, but I didn't hear Shelby cry (hubby did), and I didn't know of the drama that was surrounding my daughter as I was on the table being closed up.
Apparently, before she took a breath, she took in a huge mouthful of fluid, so they had to suction her repeatedly, and the neonatalogist was very concerned about her. AFter they got her cleared enough to move her, they asked me to hold her to take her to recovery, but I was too out of it and didn't respond.
I don't remember a lot of the recovery time, as they waited for a bed for me upstairs. I remember getting bathed, which was really freakin' weird, as Shelby got her first bath (thankfully, hubby was watching her bath, not mine!).
As we started to get acquainted, I had no idea what I was in for. The next morning would find me in excruciating pain, but not from my incision. to be continued...
Friday, July 1, 2011
And so it goes...
A year ago, I was just learning that I might be pregnant.
A year ago, my grandmother was in the closing days of her life.
A year ago, we were looking for a new place to call home.
Now, here I am, with a 16 week old daughter, and we are looking again for a new place to call home!
I will post about Shelby later.
Those are the big changes that occurred in our life this year. There are more things. When I post Shelby's birth story, you will see what I mean.
Tomorrow we are celebrating Independence Day with a life long family friend. It will be good to relax at her house, which is on the water, especially since we are under a heat advisory again tomorrow.
Stay tuned faithful readers...I will catch you up!
A year ago, my grandmother was in the closing days of her life.
A year ago, we were looking for a new place to call home.
Now, here I am, with a 16 week old daughter, and we are looking again for a new place to call home!
I will post about Shelby later.
Those are the big changes that occurred in our life this year. There are more things. When I post Shelby's birth story, you will see what I mean.
Tomorrow we are celebrating Independence Day with a life long family friend. It will be good to relax at her house, which is on the water, especially since we are under a heat advisory again tomorrow.
Stay tuned faithful readers...I will catch you up!
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